Wednesday, July 27, 2005


wish you were here, to pose with me! hahaha

westfield riccarton mall!! its only 5.45pm and its already deserted!!

went to a book shop just across the street with no intention to spend a single cent, but eventually i got myself a "REMIX" magazine!! its an interesting mag, its thick full of sexy girls and funny articles.... 15 bucks with 2 free cds and a double pass movie tix to house of the wax! haha

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

gimme gimme love

damn..... i missed jasmine so so much, even words couldnt describe how much i missed her!!! jasmine gimme gimme love now; im dying here without you. save me..... only you can.

Monday, July 25, 2005

A ciggy a day, takes your life away.....

smoke, when you think your life is shit. It takes your sorrow away for 5mins and 15mins of your life.
A ciggy aday is sure you take your life someday!!!!! dying isnt easy for a smoker, since every smoke is harmful, you might get cancer of somesort and die a slow suffering death. euthanasia isnt legal in malaysia, unlike certain countries so, QUIT SMOKING!!!

why am i writing all this bullshit anyway???

Benefits of quitting!

Compared to smokers, your…

Stroke risk is reduced to that of a person who never smoked after 5 to 15 years of not smoking

Cancers of the mouth, throat, and esophagus risks are halved 5 years after quitting

Cancer of the larynx risk is reduced after quitting

Coronary heart disease risk is cut by half 1 year after quitting and is nearly the same as someone who never smoked 15 years after quitting

Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease risk of death is reduced after you quit Lung cancer risk drops by as much as half 10 years after quitting

Ulcer risk drops after quitting

Bladder cancer risk is halved a few years after quitting

Peripheral artery disease goes down after quitting

Cervical cancer risk is reduced a few years after quitting

Low birth weight baby risk drops to normal if you quit before pregnancy or during your first trimester the benefits of quitting


$5 bucks sirloin steak..... had outing lastnight with a bunch of friends. we hit down to the casino just for the cheap dinner!! cant believe it its dirt cheap with good service.... better still its my 1st time down at the casino. B won $60bucks that night, playing sumthing like wheel of fortune cum russian roulette kinda thingy. seems interesting, i would like to put some money into it too afterwards...... lucky i dint. Its the devils game, once your in, your hooked!! haha thats what happend to the girls; they cant keep their hands off the pokie machines!! but anyway, i was there just for the chips and steak. after dinner... kensen wanted to order 1pound of hot chicken wings, and he tried to make his order...... the chinese waitress was rude and he put him off straight! hahaha it was funny to see him pissed.....

Sunday, July 24, 2005

Friday, July 22, 2005

Thank you to the people in my life
For putting up with me
And thank you for the time you sacrificed
All on account of me

For all the times I didn't say
The times I didn't say
For all the times I didn't say
The times I didn't say

Fuck you to the jaded and the fake
I'd like to see what you would do
Fuck you with the judgements that you make
We're not all perfect just like you
Like you
Like you

For all the times I didn't say
The times I didn't say
For all the times I didn't say
The times I didn't say

Thank you to the people in my life
For putting up with me

Actually i wanted to share my thoughts and scan some of the interesting chapter of the books that i've been reading .... haha but i keep on procrastinating! arghhhh
Got home quite early today.... met some of my old friends which i've havent seen them of a long time. they came over to borrow some books from my uni library, had lunch with them.

Anyway, nothing much happend, kensen(singaporean kiasu fella,jk) came over to my place and we played some music........ jammed.

working again tonight!!! arghhh!! so many things to do.... haihh. kensen and philp persuaded me to stay back.... haihh....... i dont even know am i making the right choices. i will keep on moving with my plans!! graduate baru cakap!! hehehe

coffee addict?

Lets talk about coffee!! 7 reasons for you to quit this vile addiction....
im addicted to coffee!! arghhhhhhhhh......... thats why i get moody and depressed all the time!!hehehe...okay here is the reasons why you should quit!


caffeine effects on health!! arghhh~~

Thursday, July 21, 2005

Goal setting

Setting goals in your life is vital! keeping you motivated and achieve things that you want! "everything is possible, its only a question of strategy"

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

"One who has never loved has never lived. One hour of true love is worth an age of dully living on." (C.M chen)


i woke up around 9.30am this morning and like usual... was thinking about jas. i missed her.......never would want to hurt her or make her sad in any ways. So i did some research on the internet and been reading articles about love, what a women wants and things like that. i come across this interesting article which you would want to have a look at "how to keep love in marriage" its worth a read no matter what religion are you. =>

this morning, i had a golden kiwi fruit and cornflakes for breakfast with the computer infront of me .... the 1st thing that came to my mind was "lets have a look at jasmine's blog!!" its been like this ever since i fallen deeply in love with her! Everything is jasmine jasmine jasmine........non stop 24/7 haha!
The "your in love" symptoms!!

My test is round the corner......... yayy! looking forward to it! have to study hard, i must!!

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

after all dreams are free!!


Wish that we had a chance to go traveling around........ 10 places that i'd wish to go with this fella:

10.Bora bora island
9.Port hills
8.Queens town
7.Dunedin
6.kaikoura
5.hamner springs
4. Melbourne
3.sydney
2.pangkor island
1.penang
0.redang

hehheh.... hey jas, lets plan to go somewhere in the future ok?? hehe save some $$ then save some time for a holiday. lets hope that small fart is free when im back..... haha

Friday, July 15, 2005

Don't Phunk With My Heart

Don't Phunk With My Heart
by Black Eyed Peas

Album : Monkey Business (2005)

No, no, no, don’t phunk with my heart
(Yeah)
No, no, no, don’t phunk with my heart

I wonder if I take you home
Would you still be in love, baby (in love, baby)
I wonder if I take you home
Would you still be in love, baby (in love, baby)

Girl, you know you got me, got me
With your pistol shot me, shot me
And I'm here helplessly
In love and nothing can stop me
You can't stop me cause once I start it
Can't return me cause once you bought it
I'm coming baby, don’t got it (don’t make me wait)
So let’s be about it

No, no, no, don’t phunk with my heart

Baby, have some trustin', trustin'
When I come in lustin', lustin'
Cause I bring you that comfort
I ain’t only here cause I want ya body
I want your mind too
Interestin’s what I find you
And I'm interested in the long haul
Come on girl (yee-haw)

(come on)

I wonder if I take you home
Would you still be in love, baby (in love, baby)
I wonder if I take you home
Would you still be in love, baby (in love, baby)

No, no, no, don’t phunk with my heart

Girl, you had me, once you kissed me
My love for you is not iffy
I always want you with me
I'll play Bobby and you’ll play Whitney
If you smoke, I'll smoke too
That’s how much I'm in love with you
Crazy is what crazy do
Crazy in love, I'm a crazy fool

No, no, no, don’t phunk with my heart

Why are you so insecure
When you got passion and love her
You always claimin’ I'm a cheater
Think I'd up and go leave ya
For another seƱorita
You forgot that I need ya
You must’ve caught amnesia
That’s why you don’t believe

(uh, yeah, check it out)

Don’t you worry ‘bout a thing, baby
Cause you know you got me by a string, baby
Don’t you worry ‘bout a thing, baby
Cause you know you got me by a string, baby

Baby girl, you make me feel
You know you make me feel so real
I love you more than sex appeal
(Cause you’re)
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl [6x]

[overlapping]
No, no, no, don’t phunk with my heart [2x]
That-tha, that tha, that-tha, that girl [2x]

I wonder if I take you home
Would you still be in love, baby (in love, baby) [4x]

Don’t you worry ‘bout a thang, baby
Cause you know you got me by a strang, baby
Don’t you worry ‘bout a thang, baby
Cause you know you got me by a strang, baby

Pointless nostalgia 2

Continued....................Went through the gates after collecting my boarding pass, there were not much people around, just immigration officers lingering around the place mostly. I saw few uniformed police officers around talking and standing at corners. i was trying to figure out where was terminal C4, i actually have to take a train to that terminal. i still have plenty of time then, so i decided to have a look around. dutyfree shops selling tobbaco and alcohol were everywhere!!! it was a heaven for smokers and alcoholics.....shops were filled with all sorts of alcoholic beverages and they got all the brands for tobbaco A-Z. i eventually got myself a carton, coz i know im going to need it. the place inside was just like any other shopping malls only selling stuff at a higher price.

The train was going at top speed, travelling from one end to the other end within minutes. with my skateboard on one hand and a bag on my back i walk down to locate the terminal that i was suspposed to be. There was only me at the terminal when i sat down...... suddenly my phone rang.... it was jas! we talked like we normally did....joked, laughed, and tell how much we already missed each other. i walked out from the terminal and describe how it looks like in here since, she has never been there before. she was about to leave KLIA and we had to say our goodbyes...

She was on the way back to my house where she left her car, i called my parents and before that..... my mom got lost and everyone is looking for her!!! my dad was pissed!!hahaha....anyway, my dad was complaining to me when i called him and it was kind of funny.... i wish i did not went in that early~! i called jas again on the public phone when she was on the way back to get her car, then i called again while she was driving back home!!

(just cant get enough of her, i miss her ever since.......)

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Pointless nostalgia

A blast into the past ........ the last day, last hour and my last chance to be with her. The missing entry that did not went into my journal....

It was 10am when i woke up that day(approx), my stuff was packed the day before.... but i wasnt ready to leave. i couldnt believe that it was time for me to leave her...i did what i must, i was
supposed to leave on the 16th but it was brought forward a day.

My mother took a day off that day, just to spend a
little more time with me. My parents are usually busy with their work and i dont get much time to talk to them . Usually, whenever they are back home it will be kind of late, and they are tired. My dad was collecting my flight ticks and he was busy with his work.......he went out early. Bobby (the potato couch) watches his cartoon every morning while waiting for his bus to come, was kinda sad ( or pretending to be sad) hahaha i think he's so happy that he doesnt have to share the room with me anymore and he can have the aircon on 24/7 without me nagging him about the electricity bills.....haha.
I called Jas around 1.30pm i think.... checking on her. she was having classes that day and i told her that im leaving around 4pm or so,and its okay if she couldnt make it....but she was determined to use her super driving skill to reach my house in time; and so she did(with her so-called "ferrari"!!!) haha! She is a very good "safe" driver, even though sometimes she hits the curb hahaha!! p/s:(Buy insurance before you enter her car...) Jasmine has shown me some of her car stunts when i was with her ("yihshin look, no hands!!!") hahahaha!!! she arrived early at my place, we talked and gave our last sweet affection...........

My dad was home, my sis was back........ and it was time for me to leave everyone that i cherished, loved and cared. im leaving on the jet plane........! I met my uncle and aunty at

KLIA , my cousins was flying to New Zealand too the very same day. They pass me the house keys since im arriving early....! my flight was at 6pm..... still have got 2 hours to wait, we then went down to Ronald mcdonalds "the smart clown" it was such a rip off having lunch there!!! the food was extremely expensive.....Burger Ramly at Tmn desa is much better than MCD!!! hahaha.......

the hour has cometh!!! i was at the edge of time...... hugged my family members and last huggies from jasmine. then i went away.......

TO BE CONTINUED............

reason for breathing

The harder I try to break away, the more I get lost in yesterday
The man that you know is just a shell, living without your life is hell"

I turn on the radio just to take the hurt away
Another night and I'm missing you

I don't wanna go clubbing, I got no one to dance with me
I don't wanna go shopping, I got no one to spend my money on
Spending my time with one glass of wine
Playing solitaire just to ease my mind
Poured one for you, but I drank that too
Anything to kill the pain of losing you

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

              "*~ I Never Really Knew You ~*^" +
"*~ You Where Just Another Friend ~*^" +
"*~ But When I Got To Knew You ~*^" +
"*~ I Had To Let My Heart Unbend ~*^" +
"*~ I Had To Forget My First Love ~*^" +
"*~ And Give Love Another Try ~*^" +
"*~ So I've Fallen In Love With You ~*^"+
"*~ And I'll Never Let You Go ~*^"+
"*~ I Love You More Than Anyone ~*^" +
"*~ I Just Had To Let You Know ~*^" +
"*~ And If You Ever Wonder Why ~*^" +
"*~ I Might Not Know What I'll Say ~*^" +
"*~ But I'll Never Stop Loving You ~*^" +
"*~ Each And Every Day ~*^" +
"*~ My Feelings For You Will Never Change ~*^" +
"*~ Just Know My Feelings Are True ~*^" +
"*~ And Just Remember One Thing... ~*^" +
"*~ I Really Do Love You! ~*^" +


Bullcrap

i feel like something has died inside of me..... i was not born a perfect person, no one is, mistakes is what we do, to grow.
i know what is right and wrong.... but certainly doing all the right things isnt always right, how would you know if its right if you havent done something that might screw up your life??
Emotions is what drives our motivation and actions through out life.

When you really love someone, and the other person doubts it...... what do you do?? i tried to give love unconditionally.........and now im fading away.

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Surviving the wait

How to survive a long distance relationship? i would certainly wouldnt want mine to end a painful death.

so here it is....... i copied and paste.

Surviving The Wait
Ways to keep your sanity before you meet...
by Jennifer Good

Anyone in an online relationship will tell you the same thing; the worst thing to handle is the distance and the waiting. The thoughts going through your head are enough to drive anyone crazy. A person in an online relationship can be worrying about anything and everything from looking okay to adjusting to a new city or country. So, how do you handle the little nagging thoughts in your head or the loneliness you feel at night?

1. A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words
Surrounding yourself, and your partner's living space with pictures of each other is a great way to feel each other's presence. Don't just give each other the one or two token pictures. It isn't enough to give each other a good reality of who the other person is. Constantly take pictures of yourselves in different settings. Every time you meet, take pictures of you both together. You'll want to videotape yourself as well. It is a great way for your partner to see the live you whenever they want.

2. Leave Doubt Out, Plan Your Itinerary Together
A great way to bide the time while you're waiting to see each other is to plan the itinerary for your next visit. Research together online the local city guides and relevant tourist attraction web sites. Not only will this help take away the question of what to do, it will help add even more excitement and anticipation towards your visit.

3. Get In Touch With Their Life
Take the time to get in touch with whom your online love really is. Learning about their home and their history is a great way to accomplish this. Take turns revealing something about your past or somewhere you like to go. Use local city guides to find pictures of your favorite places to go and show them to your online love.

4. Start A Countdown Ritual
Each time you are about to meet in person, start some type of countdown ritual. It could be something as simple as telling each other how many days are left each day. Or, you could send a daily e-mail with how many days that are left. It is fun to look forward to something, and it helps assure you that it really is going to happen.

5. Surround Them With You
Sight is a wonderful sense, but it isn't fulfilling enough on its own. Assault your online love's senses with other reminders of you. When you meet you won't feel as foreign to each other if you've already smelled their cologne or perfume. They'll know your likes and dislikes if you share your favorite music, movies and food. Your partner will know your mannerisms already if you've exchanged videotapes or make use of a web cam. When people in real life are dating they have more than just a communication exchange to recall. Giving your partner a chance to recall other senses helps make you feel entirely more real to them.

Remember to make your time apart an opportunity to fulfill some personal goals and dreams that aren't always as easy to do once you're living with someone. Surround yourself with friends and family when you're feeling down. And, when all else fails, know that true love really is worth the wait.

55 things to do instead of sex

Here’s a quick list of fun ideas to jumpstart your evenings and weekends. Grab a friend or two and...

1. Go on a picnic with friends
2. Bake cookies
3. Play on the monkey bars at the park
4. Go out to eat
5. Slide down a grass hill on a block of ice
6. Go horseback riding
7. Go roller blading
8. Do something kind for a needy person
9. Go bowling
10. Try making a new recipe

11. Throw a 70’s party
12. Get your friends and go on a video scavenger hunt
13. Wash each other’s car
14. Go people watching at the mall
15. Explore an interesting part of your town
16. Get some culture and go to a symphony or ballet

17. Ride bikes in the park
18. Go to a deli and order something you’ve never tasted
19. Dedicate a song on the radio
20. Write each other poems

21. Volunteer at soup kitchen
22. Go to a museum
23. Ride a carousel
24. Get a group together for volleyball
25. Take a walk together
26. Plan a mystery dinner for friends
27. Go to church together
28. Dress up and go to McDonald’s
29. Get friends and play board games
30. Send a funny card

31. Learn how to swing dance
32. Join a coed softball team
33. Jump on a trampoline
34. Look at travel books and find places you would like to go
35. Chop up things in the blender and make “food-art”
36. Read a book and discuss it
37. Do homework together
38. Audition for parts in a school play
39. Have breakfast at sunrise
40. Hide love notes where the other will find them

41. Spend an evening with each other’s families
42. Choose a special song
43. Do a craft project
44. Take a fun class at your community college together
45. Have a candlelight dinner with another couple
46. Search for “treasures” in second hand stores
47. Volunteer at a crisis nursery
48. Send candy or flowers
49. Have a campfire
50. Tie die T-shirts

51. Rescue a puppy or kitty from the pound
52. Take a car full of kids to the drive-in movie
53. Blow up balloons and stuff a friends car
54. Have a canned whipped cream fight outside
55. “Kidnap” a friend at 6:00 a.m. and go out to breakfast

http://littlelifepmc.org/sex_instead_of.htm

i came across some articles which is kinda interesting(for me) in regards about relationships & sex.

a Doubt....

You think you know
It is fun to be in my shoes,
You think you know
All the things I have been thru,

You have no idea being a reject in this world,
If there is a way that I can eject like a pilot,knows what is coming,
My failures is higher than the mountains,
Low self-esteem is like a tumor inside,

It grows exponentially, like knowledge,
Bringing ourselves up again whenever we fall,
Shaving blade used to stand on the edge of my wrist,
Wishing someone would call,

Hang on

Hang On
Well now I found myself
Wish I was someone else
My hands are stained with love
Wish I could take it away
I hid behind the shell
In time the pain will melt
My hands are stained with love
Wish I could fake it

I gave my life away
There’s nothing left to say
I gave my life away
You take it in your way

You take it in your way

My selfish enemy
Still has the best of me
Empty and feeling numb
Wish I could take it away
I can’t control the need
To weak to not concede
Wish I was deaf and dumb
Wish I could fake it

I gave my life away
There’s nothing left to say
I gave my life away
You take it in your way

I gave my life away
There’s nothing left to say
I gave my life away
You take it in your way

I can’t pretend we’re the same
I can’t pretend we’re the same
I can’t pretend we’re the same

Oh now I found myself
Wish I was someone else
My hands are stained with love
Wish I could FAKE

I gave my life away
There’s nothing left to say
I gave my life away
You take it in your way

I gave my life away
There’s nothing left to say
I gave my life away
You take it in your way

You take it in your way [4x]

Sunday, July 10, 2005

The Free Bum addict


Every single day, i have to talk to this free bum here! cant get enough of this person here! what can i say??? since i met her, i spend most of my life here on MSN!! Arghhhhh....... she can really make you laugh till your teeths falls off.

Been talking to her yesterday night till 4.45am (my time). after that i went straight to bed and sleep like a log!! woke up today around 12pm arghhh!! there goes my day!! half of it is gone.....hehe but it doesnt really matter anyway, if i were in malaysia that would be a waste. cant afford to waste my time there..... coz during my last visit it was a very short period, i was meant to come back 1 month earlier but i was dedicated to my work ($$) as i needed some $$ to spend while im back. that was the time then......

What is the main (daily) goal in life?? Happiness (simple) Are you happy now?? im not sure myself....... what makes you think that your happy? how do you define that simple term? arghh........ questions that doesnt have a point!!!

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Death seems like an easy way out...

Sometimes when things are so hard. whenever you think about life, its so hard to live in this world. death sure looks like a way to get out of this world. you studied so hard just to get a piece of paper that state your capable of doing certain things in which you have gain certain knowledged/skills.

Yet i dont really know what do i want to do with my life. life is full of choices, but dammit i aint choosing 'hope' this time!! i wish to quit sometimes, but i know i cant.......... comes what may, but i aint quitting!! "in company, people quit, in life, people quit"(Trump.D 2005) . suddenly, my life seems like hell! HELL YEAH!! hahaha To hell with books after this semester!

"DO or DO NOT, There is no TRY!!" (yoda)

Saturday, July 02, 2005


"All mine!!" this gollum! look at her, holding all her precious! hahahaha. Posted by Picasa

BLowing my Budget

Shit i think im over spending!! i spend 20bucks on a dvd yesterday, 20 bucks again on renting 6 dvd for the week! thats 40 bucks gone in entertainment! dammit.... haha overspending! the holidays are coming to and end! new sem is starting soon! arghh! just wish that i could just get the fuck out of here and go home after my finals.